Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Lou Dobbs: Rebel without a cause

I'm exaggerating of course. He looks nothing like Marlon Brando. But seriously....When have you ever ever ever heard Lou Dobbs be pro anything? He's anti-immigration, anti-outsourcing, anti-taxcuts, anti-free-trade, anti-Bush, anti-Gore, anti-Kerry, anti-Clinton, anti-Obama, anti-you, anti-me and the latest, anti-bailout.

There's one thing to be anti-something and pro-other, but to pull off anti-everything requires a special talent and of all the people that I know, only Lou has that. Why, yesterday, he even wrote a commentary against adopting abandoned puppies saying that it would amount to blanket amnesty for people that abandon puppies.

According to insider sources within CNN, Lou is working on a commentary railing against commentaries. Out to prove a point, he's put his own commentaries top on the list of commentaries he's against. The entire country is eagerly awaiting this anti-commentary commentary. Commentators on both ends of the political spectrum are busy commentating on the pros and cons of such a bold tactic, one that is even more bold than John McCain's selection of Sarah Palin as his running mate (In case you are wondering... Lou is anti-McCain and anti-Palin as well). How he's going to pull this one off has all the makings of a prime-time reality show (he's against those as well).

In other news, there are reports of a spike in binocular sales in the 49th state as more and more Alaskans look West towards Russia in order to gain better foreign policy experience, in case McCain-Palin get elected and they are called upon to staff the State Department.
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